She sleeps in the window sill with her face in the dish of oat grass.
She stuck her head in the Halloween candy bucket and took a candy lipstick. She batted it around and carried it in her mouth for a half hour. 🙂 lol
She wakes me by placing her paw on my forehead and verrrry slowwwwly, and with increasing pressure…sticks one single claw into my skin until I yell “OW”.
Some mornings she will strategically place a fang on my thumb between the nail and the cuticle and clamp down using slow, increasing pressure until she achieves the same result of me yelling in pain.
Her torture methods are methodical and effective.
I think her most recent past life was spent as a torturer in a prison camp. Because she’s very careful not to break the skin or leave visible marks, she may have worked under the direction of the CIA. I’m thankful she can’t fill a Neti Pot and subject me to simulated drowning.